Love Spell Mishaps!

I’m convinced that Victoria Secret’s Love Spell body spray is love juice for all kinds of bugs! It has the opposite effect of Deep Wood’s Off! Which by the way, does not deter fleas!
At the beginning of the summer on one of my many trips to the mall, I fell in love with the scent, so I bought a bottle. Since that day when I feel the Love Spell need, I’ve noticed that if there is a bug within a thirty mile radius, it is attracted to me! I’ve had bug run-ins with fleas and a gigantic red wasp, all while I was wearing the Love Bug Potion!
My flea experience was the worst bug experience of my entire life! Being from the desert fleas, as well as other life forms, do not live there easily so I’ve never had a flea encounter before. Well, there is a first time for everything! Most bugs that bother me are usually big and ugly. Not anymore. I’ve added teeny tiny black and ugly to that list too!
This is how it all went down: I blame the stray cats (we had five one night hob knobbing under my car) for infesting my yard with their vile fleas. I park my car near the grass. I love to leave the car windows down to air out said car. It rains. Fleas flee to dry place, ie: Car. I enter car with delectable Love Spell bug magnetism spray, fleas cling to the Love, if you know what I mean! Fleas hitched a ride into house on pants or shoes, and that is when I freaked out and hit the roof, because before then I didn’t know what they were or that I had them. It makes me itch just thinking about it! Eww! Did you know that fleas are attracted to some and not others? Probably only the ones that use VS Love Spell “Come and Get It” bug, I mean body spray, because husband and Kamee didn’t have one bite on them! I was the only one! About 20 of them on my legs!
Thank goodness for Seven Dust. We sprinkled the lovely white powder all over my house and car against the warning label on the package that said it was for outdoors use only. Then my husband called the exterminator and he sprayed the yard the next day. Yay! All is well and fleas are dead. Love is restored! Zen…
About two weeks later, I had a burning Love Spell desire. That afternoon when I got home from work, I noticed fresh bites on still healing legs! A new Freak that lives within me, emerged! Husband got right back on the phone with the exterminator to make life easier on everyone! Fleas again disappear from yard and household. I’m skeptical, wondering if the exterminator is trustworthy in my defense against the repugnant pest… After a few weeks of being nuisance free as well as Love Spell free, I return to happy, easier to live with self.
Fast forward to the day when “Oops I Love Spelled it again” with renewed confidence that fleas are not longer habituating in my life. For most of the day, I forgot all about bugs and body spray. Just went about my work day, outside for a few free minutes to soak up some of the last rays before a storm was due. Back inside, I was chatting with a gal pal in her office when I notice something on my flip flopped foot! It looked like it had long legs, like a light brown spider… I Bucked Like A Mule! Gal pal said, “I think it flew outta here!” We looked around for it, but I told her that it was probably down in my office waiting for me. Back at my office, other gal pals and I were reliving my latest bug event, when out of nowhere this colossal wasp is flying right for me! He had me in his radar, blinded by the lure of the Love Spell! In my desperation for cover, I slammed the door shut! An office buddy clubbed the wasp to death and I have made detailed plans for prompt disposal of Love Spell!